Cynically Optimistic

Another shot from the cathedral this past weekend.

Walking to the gym most days I head down York Avenue, and depending on the sequence of lights and traffic eventually bang a right and weave my way to 2nd Ave. About half the time, for whatever reason, I get to the Queensboro Bridge and am forced to turn right and stroll past Scores. Today was one of those days. Just at the corner, an attractive young couple stops me:

Tourist Guy: Excuse me. Do you know the vay into zis gym?

Me: What gym are you looking for?

TG: This one, here. *points up at Scores Awning*

Me: Well, the door is just down the block, but that's not a gym. It's a strip club.

TG: Strip Club? What is?

Me: Girls. Boobies. Dancing. You know?

Tourist Girl: *gasps*

Me: But I'm on my way to a real gym, if that's what you want you can follow me.

And then we all went to the gym. En route I learned that they are Dutch and are here in NY for only a few days before heading to Miami and then Los Angeles. I hope Uli designed their wardrobes.

Fast Forward to this afternoon. I'm walking from one meeting to another - all of 2 blocks. The intersection I need to cross is completely jammed with cars, vans, busses, and an ambulance (luckly the sirens were not going). Some blond bitch in a BMW 7 Series (and with a handsfree cellphone microphone in her ear) inches her way into the pedestrian crosswalk completely blocking my path, but getting exactly nowhere due to the traffic situation. No one can move, yet she leans on her horn for a solid 5 seconds.

I notice that her windows are down, and I snap. I leaned INTO her window and yelled out, "HOOOOOOOOOOOOONNNNNNKKKKKK!!!!!" inches from her face. She recoils, dropping her pen and releasing the horn. Then I calmly say, "pretty obnoxious huh?" and walk around the jam up the sidewalk.

I think I heard someone start clapping as I walked away.