Cynically Optimistic

Location: Random graduate student party on Long Island. Very mixed crowd - all ages, types, etc. I'm standing in between the liquor table and the snack table in the kitchen. Someone arrives with a huge tray of brownies and a Tupperware container of some mysterious brown liquid. A few people are making a fuss about the brown liquid (which turn out to be meatballs), eventually shoving it into the microwave. A few minutes later...

Random Chick: [to me] Do you want the other half of my meatball?
Me: Um, is that some sort of a pickup line?
RC: No, I'm not eating this half, I'm a vegetarian.
Me: Huh? How does that work?
RC: I'm a vegetarian, so I'm only allowed to chew it up and then I have to spit it out, but I love the taste.
Me: Really now? I wasn't aware of that technicality.
RC: ...
Me: What-ev, gimme the other half of that meatball.

I eat the girl's meatball and we end up talking for over an hour. [Ed. -- I just re-read that sentence and it sound extremely dirty.] My favorite part of the conversation was after I had explained a few things about my life, and how I moved to L.I. but was soon moving to NYC.

RC: Oh, you are going to do so much blow when you get to New York.
Me: I don't do drugs.
RC: I got really caught up in the scene with celebrities, like the cousin of Chloe Sevigny.
Me: She counts as a celebrity?
RC: I was doing so much heroin and coke all the time, I just had to move outta the East Village.
Me: I think I need another jello-shot.
*We both enjoy a jello shot*
RC: Really good things are going to happen for you in New York, I can tell. I'm partially psychic.
Me: ...
RC: No, really, I get these feelings about things, and they're totally always right.
Me: Uh, okay, well that's good to hear then! Are there any more meatballs left?

As an aside, the party gets an A+ for alcohol and preparation. The hosts pre-mixed shot cocktails into bottles, complete with labels like "The Incredible Hulk" (which was Mtn Dew, Triple Sec and Vodka = NASTY), and "Sit on my Face" which was incredibly popular despite the fact that it tasted like ass. *Ba-dum Ching!* But the Jello-shot Cosmo's were great. Just like making a cosmopolitan, but use Raspberry Jello and slightly less booze. Delicious!